Make Every Day Valentine's Day

It's in the interests of restaurants to sell high price meals on Valentine's day and newspapers to carry ads promoting it, and to run columns the week after making everybody feel guilty so that you can be sure of selling high priced meals and advertising space next year.

I am suggesting a consumer revolution. That as many people as possible buy the bunches of flowers reduced to half price in the supermarkets the next day.

Or we could have a second Valentine's Day, like boxing day, so that secretaries and people who don't warrant the money or emotional commitment can be given a little fun, without sexual overtones, and feel appreciated. I'm sure the restaurants will go for this.

Second night you get a glass of champagne, not a bottle, or a sparkling wine, not champagne, and they get to use their decorations a second night. Or do it like Christmas, make Valentine's week. Dinners all week. That way you can hardly avoid it.

Or, like Christmas, they can run a second Valentine's menu alongside the ordinary one as an option. Why haven't I, yet, written to the men in my life to say, 'Where Were You?' I should have I written to say, 'You'd better turn up with a rose between your teeth, a bottle of champagne and a box of chocolates next time you see me.'

Frankly, I'm prepared to provide the champagne myself. It's sitting on the shelf doing nothing. I get cheap bottles of wine from clubs which claim they don't have a budget for speakers. All I need is the man to pretend he's an adoring lover.

Is this going to be the year when Valentine's Day was blank for you? Can we redeem the situation?Millions of women didn't get invited out to dinner on Valentine's Day.

Or they went to the poetry club where everybody read Valentine's Day poetry.(The club should have had champagne and roses.)

There must be loads of clubs and meetings which fell on Valentine's Day, so that the chairman and secretary had to turn up. And loads of women whose husbands and boyfriends forgot and then didn't know how to make amends.

The man was overseas, or working late. Or busy with his wife, didn't realise until the day after, thought he'd be entertaining Suzie who went off with a man who made a better offer, whatever.

Or the lady might have half a dozen admirers who think she must be busy that day. (She pretends she is.) They'd like to take her out later.

Or they may think that Valentine's day is not just a financial commitment but an emotional commitment. Only for people who are about to get married and gives the impression you are already engaged.

They'd rather invite out a blind date and play at romancing, without looking like they are desperate.

What do you say to all those people who ask you what you did on Valentine's Day? Wouldn't you rather say, 'I was busy working, had a meeting.'

I'm sure lots of girls would rather have a romantic dinner with a glass of champagne and a card saying 'I adore you', or 'most beautiful girl in the world', plus a red rose, from somebody she loves, or even an acquaintance, the day after Valentine's.

Rather than spend all week reading those newspaper columns saying half the world sat at home wondering why the weren't popular last Tuesday. Advising on running on a treadmill so you don't feel suicidal.

So how can you offer a romantic post-Valentine's dinner without sounding like a cheapskate? Or that the woman is a second best afterthought?

I'm sure I'd have been delighted if either of the two (or more) great loves in my life had said, 'Sorry I couldn't see you on Valentine's Day. I'll make it up to you by taking you out for a very special dinner this weekend / week.'

Could the conversation go differently? You say either:
a) I want to take you out on Valentine's day for a romantic dinner. But the best restaurants are booked up and seem to have a set menu. Would you rather go out on the day, or shall we treat the another day that week as Valentine's day and I'll use the money I've saved to buy you some little goodies.

At this point I ask, 'What sort of little goodies?' By this time I'm sold on the idea.

Maybe not. I supposed this is really for couples who are married and living together and have a joint budget.

The trouble is once you've offered the little goodies, if I opt for the real day, I'm still hoping for the goodies. You could say, 'Would you rather have dinner and a rose on Tuesday? Or dinner on Wednesday - and with what I've saved I can afford whole bunch of roses.

Of course, I may suspect you are two-timing and taking somebody else out on the day, giving me second choice date. Or you say: 'I'm busy at work on Tuesday, (or whatever day it is). I'll send you a card/email on Tuesday, and I can take you out to dinner Thursday, or Friday, whichever you prefer.'

Look here, let's get to the point. I'm a romantic looking for a romantic. If anybody wants to take me out to a champagne dinner and give me a card and a rose, (and if you are feeling generous and hoping to get lucky, a sterling silver charm bracelet at under a tenner from any chain store jeweller in the UK, or any shopping mall cart basement level in the Far East, or any airport duty free rack) any day of the year is fine by me.

Maybe what I need is a rich submissive. Then I needn't wait. I can tell him what to do for me next Valentine's Day. Or any day next week. Any offers?